She went on to explain that wearing makeup daily causes others to see you as “put together and more successful.” At the time, I wasn’t so sure how I felt about the comment. However, as I’ve grown in my career, I have personally witnessed a difference that it can make for people. I have since gone on to teach several different career management courses to others, and I frequently get asked for career advice from other women. The most common questions I get include:
· How do I get unstuck in my career?
· How do I get noticed so that I can get promoted?
· How can I get my manager to realize I am ready for new responsibilities?
Most of the time, it’s people who are over 30 who seek this type of advice from me. They’ve had a successful start to their career, and have the typical busy life that happens when you have a family. Lots of obligations — a career, spouse, children, aging parents —and very little time to think of themselves any more. Often they start to feel less relevant at work, and invisible to the opposite sex. Maybe they can admit that they have let themselves go “just a little bit.” They feel too busy and too tired to make the time and effort to take care of themselves.
Want to know what my first response to these career questions is?
I don’t start out by telling them how to better promote their work and achievements, to brush up their resume, or to build their career network. My first advice is to begin with the easiest action to take, but the most difficult to hear:
“You need to change your look.”
Of course, I say this gently, with compassion and kindness. However, that doesn’t make it any easier to hear. For people who are hungry for any insight into making a positive change, this advice is followed up with questions like:
- How can I be more attractive?
- What do I need to change?
Those people are the easy ones to help, as they embrace advice such as:
Dress for the job you want, not the job you have.
Take a look at the people one or two levels above you. Notice the type and style of clothing. Pay attention to details like hairstyle, grooming, and details such as their preferred shoes and accessories. Is there anything you can change about yourself to look the part? If you’re still not sure ask a trusted colleague or mentor for advice, and be specific:
“Bob, is this lumber-sexual beard holding me back in my career? Should I consider trimming it shorter?”
“Judy, do these khaki pants make me look frumpy or less professional?”
When a person begins improving their wardrobe and grooming habits to look more professional and put together, other people take notice. I have seen it make a big difference — improving a person’s confidence and helping to making positive career and lifestyle improvements.
Other people take more time to convince though.
If that’s you, maybe it’s time to stop believing in the fantasy that “people should like you for who you are.” Instead, consider changing your look as an investment in your career and even your romantic relationship.
If you don’t want to take my word for it, how about some research-based proof? A study from Research in Social Stratification and Mobility (June 2016) found that “attractive individuals earn roughly 20% more than people of average attractiveness, but this gap is reduced when controlling for grooming.”
The study is suggesting that anyone who does the best with what they have can close that income gap. I’m not suggesting that suddenly wearing makeup to work or improving how you dress will earn you a 20% raise, but doing these things certainly won’t hurt your chances! If you’re still not convinced, make a small change and see if anyone notices. Men can switch out loafers for dress shoes, or wear a more fitted shirt. Women can go from flats to heels and from wearing pants to a skirt. It’s probably going to feel uncomfortable at first. But that’s okay. Growth and change happens when we feel discomfort.
